I sported a beard over the past few years, that is to say I kind of fluctuated between stubbly bumfluff and full viking on a "Cant be arsed/ its expensive to shave" basis. I even bought into the whole male beard grooming bollocks that was fashionable recently. I had the electric beard trimmer and everything!
Then, over Christmas on our cruise, I saw lots of males with varying face carpets and a moment passed, a shadow moved across the waters, a penny dropped and yea twas like a veil being lifted. I realised: Beards were so last year; overly commonplace, scruffy and just a general statement of laziness.
Now, like other hipsters of the same ilk, I've now been sporting the clean shaven look and I am championing it as the new wave of male fashion statements.
That aside, Mrs Gnomepants V2.0 often makes comment about the kemptness of my head hair. I've always been a bit of a hairy yeti though recently, now I have a respectable job and need to make an impression with people of "traditional values", I've compromised and agreed to three hair cuts per year moreso now since my hair is thinning due to age, and I start to resemble Joanna Yeates' landlord Christopher Jefferies if I leave it too long. But when Mrs Gnomepants V2.0 insists on a trip to the barbers, I dig my heels in firmer and find any excuse not to go. Eventually I do give in though. I mean I'm 45 now...I have to be responsible and adult and stuff. Sometimes cardigans and slippers alone can't cut it...