But at the core of these fanciful tales remained a truth. A bold and brazen truth. That of me. Stegzy Gnomepants. Some say I am the imaginings of a deranged criminal mastermind, others (including those who have met me) a tall fair haired thirty something using a name like Cher, or Bono, or The Edge in an effort to preserve some anonymity. Of course there are also those that say I don't exist, that I am Lord Lucan or some ancient Atlantean God. Foolish people.
So about me. Well as I say. I am Stegzy Gnomepants. I am 35ish and I live in a small back water town in the North of England. This town is called Barnsley. Originally I am from
However, with jobs not being worth very much in this neck of the woods and the shock of relocation giving me a wake up call, I realised that I needed to actually do something with my life rather than sit round dishing out cod computer advice and changing passwords for people all day. So I took it upon myself to remove myself from the jobs market and undertake a degree in Journalism and Media. Which is what I do now.
But what about the other bits? Well....I used to hate my job; I don't like living in Barnsley; I like creating and taking part in polls; I extol the virtues of local and independently produced food; I am a man; I write long long long posts; I write short posts; I waffle; I like crap 1960's British Sci-Fi; I go off on tangents; I spell things wrong and I frequently use incorrect punctuation; I am tall; I wear shirts; I can balance a spoon on my nose; I once sailed the Pacific in a teaspoon.
Yeah well most of that is true.