Stegzonopolis Gnomicpantalon (stegzy) wrote,
Stegzonopolis Gnomicpantalon

therealljidol - Intro Post

Long ago. Well...maybe not that long ago. More like 34 years ago. But for the purpose of creating a dramatic atmosphere I'll say long ago. Anyway, long ago (back in the woolly wilds of the 1970s) in a galaxy far far away. Again this is a bit of an exaggeration, it was actually closer than that. More like here. This galaxy. I came to this planet in the same way as most of us do (though I believe there are some exceptions) by departing the mother ship (though my mum would probably berate me for calling her a ship). Since then I've had all manner of adventures, battling giant robots, fighting the evils of marmite and parsnips, rubbing porridge onto parts best left unimagined and telling tall tales to bewildered people who question "Did he really do that?" and "How much of that was made up?".

But at the core of these fanciful tales remained a truth. A bold and brazen truth. That of me. Stegzy Gnomepants. Some say I am the imaginings of a deranged criminal mastermind, others (including those who have met me) a tall fair haired thirty something using a name like Cher, or Bono, or The Edge in an effort to preserve some anonymity. Of course there are also those that say I don't exist, that I am Lord Lucan or some ancient Atlantean God. Foolish people.

So about me. Well as I say. I am Stegzy Gnomepants. I am 35ish and I live in a small back water town in the North of England. This town is called Barnsley. Originally I am from Atlantis Liverpool which is in the North West of England. You might remember Liverpool as being the home of the Beatles, Ghengis Khan and Elvis Presley but then again you might not. Regardless, Liverpool is my home town. But, as the fates would have it, circumstances change and in 2006 I gave up a life of Riley as a Computer Helpdesk Operator in a vibrant and exciting British city and I was forced willingly relocated to Barnsley.

However, with jobs not being worth very much in this neck of the woods and the shock of relocation giving me a wake up call, I realised that I needed to actually do something with my life rather than sit round dishing out cod computer advice and changing passwords for people all day. So I took it upon myself to remove myself from the jobs market and undertake a degree in Journalism and Media. Which is what I do now.

But what about the other bits? Well....I used to hate my job; I don't like living in Barnsley; I like creating and taking part in polls; I extol the virtues of local and independently produced food; I am a man; I write long long long posts; I write short posts; I waffle; I like crap 1960's British Sci-Fi; I go off on tangents; I spell things wrong and I frequently use incorrect punctuation; I am tall; I wear shirts; I can balance a spoon on my nose; I once sailed the Pacific in a teaspoon.

Yeah well most of that is true.
Tags: about-me, classic, therealljidol
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