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The Existential Compost

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1st July 2011

Radford Smelly @ 00:26


in late night neighbour news:

The deaf old git downstairs had a bath tonight then decided he couldn't get out of it. I only discovered this about 30 mins ago having heard him merrily banging the life out of it with his stick in an attempt to attract some attention.

So I nipped out to check he was ok. it was then he inferred, through his bathroom window, it was my fault he had been stuck in there all that time since 9pm because I hadn't heard the old differ knocking seven bells out of his bathroom suite.

I was like "orly" and, on finding I couldn't gain access to his gaff, had to call the police. They arrived swiftly and broke in with all the finesse of a council estate smackhead and fetched him out. He complained at anyone who would listen so they got the ambulance people to come and babysit.

They're still there now. Hearing the conversation as clearly as I can while now, myself, safely tucked up in bed, reminds me how thin these walls and floors are here.

He's fine though. just after a bit of attention by the sounds of it. Yet another example of why I hope I don't end up that frail and hopeless when I'm his age.

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Date:30th June 2011 23:43 (UTC)
I feel like this entry should make me feel sad, but I actually found it weirdly hilarious. And very sad. But mostly hilarious.
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Date:1st July 2011 07:05 (UTC)
I second this!
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Date:1st July 2011 18:17 (UTC)
You'd think he'd want to move into some sort of residential home where there are people on hand to hoist him out of the bath, rather than relying on the neighbours - I mean, what if you'd been out?

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